windsurfing recall

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windsurfing recall

from rec.windsurfing:

SACRAMENTO (Rueters) - The California Secretary of State said today that
enough signatures have been gathered to recall Windsurfing. Analysts say
that the poor conditions for the last couple of seasons has generated
sufficient discontent to motivate the recall movement.

Windsurfing's strongest challenger in the polls is Golf and he has come out
swinging. In a statement, Golf says that he doesn't need the money, and
that he only wants to the best for California. Rumor has it that Golf has
some undisclosed skeletons in the closet, and is well-known for being far
more addictive and more of a time and money sink than Windsurfing.
Candidates Tennis and Bridge are being encouraged by Golf proponents to drop
out of the race to avoid diluting Golf support.

Emerging as a replacement for Windsurfing, Kitesurfing, has thrown his hat
into the ring. Quoted today, Kitesurfing says that he opposes the
recall,but if it passes, that voters should cast their ballot for him.
"Sure, it's not really 'surfing' you're really just dangling from a pair of
lines, but hey, if it's light, you're still getting a session." He also
said that he provides to only real viable alternative to Golf. "Everyone
knows that Golf isn't really a sport, it's just a past time. Besides,
Golfers are all just a bunch of fat guys in bad pants," Kitesurfing said.

In a speech the other day, Windsurfing was defensive and defiant. He
claimed that the recall is all a conspiracy of Golf and his opponents, and
the poor conditions of the last couple seasons are not his fault. "How were
we supposed to know that the boom years of the late 90's and early 2000
wouldn't continue? It's not my fault that the North Pacific High hasn't
built in consistently and provided the consistent sailable conditions of a
couple years ago. And what's with all these guys trying to sail on 5.0's
every day on 80 liter boards? It's not shortboardable every day folks."
Under Windsurfing's leadership, total sailable days have declined from a
record surplus of sailable days in 2000 to a cumulative deficit of 30
billion skunk days in 2003.

A random sampling of reactions to the recall taken at a local windsurfing
site ranged from "Huh?" to "But it nuked yesterday" to "I'm rigging me up a
beer."

The field is a crowded one with over 130 candidates including Surfing,
Mountain Biking, and lesser known candidates such as Watching the Weather
Channel and Self Gratification While Surfing the Internet.

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Hi, I'm Dirk Bike. I just wanted to get into the race too because I join most all races. I stand for equal gay dirt bike marriages, legal dirt bike 2 stroke smoking ( but for recereational purposes only ), all bad clergy should be taken for a little tight trail ride, individual water rights to keep all the creek crossings open and, of course, free and open trade with Japan ( our largest product provider ). Again, my name is Dirk Bike and please vote for me. Every vote counts and since my coffers are really full at this time, I want to promise everyone who votes for me $5.

Thanks and Good Night - We all do it in the Dust sometimes we just don't know it.

Dirk Bike

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Dirk,
I think something other than your coffers are full, little motorbike boy.
Yours truly,
Aanold

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